thoughts about being ill

[alicewoolf]

I find that on the days I feel slightly better my mind wants to think back over all the times when I was ill. Sometimes it feels almost obsessive like I can't let go of the memories of being ill. I just go round and round in my head. Its frustrating because I've had enough of being ill and just want to move on. and on the rare occasions that I do feel better I want to enjoy feeling ok instead of obsessing about how ill I've been. Any advice on how to do this anyone?

[lili2701]

i know exactly what u mean, it's just the fear of feeling and being ill again so u can't stop thinking about it cos u've been ill for too long that u think u actually can't not be ill anymore and it freaks u out, isnt it? or u have a little saboteur within u that makes u ill cos there's a purpose to this (I guess most pp have that)
I feel there's a part of me who wants to be ill although I'm struggling and doing everything I can not to, I wouldn't admit it first but going deeper I understood it. Being ill means protection from the outside in a sense, we have the illness to hide behind and to prevent us from doing things, ie living ie getting hurt! the key part is to understand it and find out what is the root cause.
Now there are so other parameters too..

EFT is fantastic to get rid of these obsessive thoughts and turn them into nice one and also the stop stop stop of Gupta! all these techniques help retraining the brain for us to think differently cos we control our brain and not the other way round, we have the power to change our thoughts if we want to but for that we first need to retrain it cos all these years the brin has learned to think that way as that's what we've done!
what is helping is instead of having bad thoughts of being ill, which according to the gupta approach means that u confirm to ur brain that u're ill and feel bad, you instead stop the thought and think of sthg positive; a time u were feeling good, u winning the lottery, u being with a lover etc and the more u do that the more ur brain will understand that it's the new way of thinking and that's what he'll do. the thing is we've been thinking about CFS for years so now we're going backwards and it might take time to retrain the brain by positive thinking. I find it the most difficult when u feel really crap but still think that today is today and every thought we have influence the future, so if u think negatively all the time, u'll attract negativity into ur life, if u're scared of sthg u'll attract that sthg for sure, if u feel confident and happy and really feel it deeply and do that everyday, ur life will change.

there u go! Also thinking about being ill is just a thought, easy to change in a world, why think that and not positive stuff instead? what I mean is that se can all do that and it can only help!

[Minaret]

MENTAL MOVIES

"A chief cause of unhappiness and illness is what is called mental movies. Mental movies are a misuse of the imagination. You know how it goes. You have a painful experience, an illness or an accident, an argument with someone, then after its finished you run it over and over in your mind. You visualize what you said, did, how you felt, etc etc. As awful as it is, you feel compelled to repeat the film day and night. It is as if you were locked inside a theatre playing a horror movie.

To break out of the pattern, first be aware that you ARE running a mental movie. Be conscious of its mechanical hold on your mind.

Then, by deliberate choice, break it off. Shake your head or snap your fingers, take a deep breath, anything that shows you have noticed the mental movie creeping back... and then break it off, stop the movie.

Now, at this instant, take a quick look.. obviously you cant see inside, but feel it, feel any anxiety or stress or pain and the location of it. Really feel this. This is what the mind has been avoiding. Where is your pain right now? It is not there is it. It has moved somewhere else or even disappeared. You have now accomplished something great. You have proved that you CAN snap the film and its tyrannical pain. You are free and you are free RIGHT NOW.

Try the above method for yourself. Even though you succeed at first for just a split second, you have succeeded completely! But the movie monster might keep coming back, so you might have to do this again and again before it stops completely. Now realizing that small success is possible, you can advance to great success!"....

From Eckhart Tolle's book 'The Power of Now'

If you are interested in anything to do with Eckhart Tolle you can join this group on facebook

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=28876895692

[alicewoolf]

Thanks you guys your posts were really helpful. Lili I agree with you about a small stubborn self-sabotaging part of us 'wants' to be ill. Of course we are all desperate to be well, but as you say, illness offers some sort of protection (albeit horrible) from the outside world. I got into this weird phase where every time I thought about getting/being well I felt frightened and anxious. But I trying everything I can to change these thoughts. EFT does help for a while but then it comes back. Not sure why!

And Minaret, what you said about stopping the 'movie' was extremely helpful. I already do 'stops' and that helps but I am going to try to do it more deeply. If ever proof were needed that human beings are supremely adaptable and get used to ANYTHING, then this is it. It feels like I've been ill for so long that its easier to stay ill than get well. But I'll fight for my life to get well. I want my life back.

[lili2701]

god Alice we're so alike!
i'm the same, i realised i'm scared to be healthy!!
watch this video:
tp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBrejpdOvc8

we need to practise that every day cos every thought we have is training our brain! so the more we think and feel positively (because saying words but feeling the opposit wont work of course), then the closer to health we'll get.
A friend of mine who has CFS is being so much better thanks to the gupta apparoach and a diet+supplements her doc gave her, she says gupta really works, so we have to stick to it and believe we are safe!

we can do it guys!!

[annie]

lili, i can't get the you tube link, is it me or is something funny going on? could you give the title, then i can type that in. i'm not scared to be healthy unless it is buried so deep in my unconscious that i have never been able to dig it out. i can imagine it though when you are getting much better, gupta talks about that doesn't he? says take the re-entry very gently.

[lili2701]

hello!
here's the link again

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBrejpdOvc8

hope it works now, apparently the HT was cut..

its a video of a girl who had health issues for years, IBS and sthg else and she's healed and realised she was actually scared to be ok, so robert Smith taps with her on the issue. he's a magic guy, he is, I find his approach really helping.

I think when we've been ill for so long its like the illness is part of us, like we dunno who we are when it's not there anymore and what we'll do with our lives and who we will be and what people will say etc.. Some people might want to stay ill subconsciously because their mum/boyfriend or whover looks after them and they need that, or some might want to stay ill because they went through such traumas when "living" and being healthy that they consider life is a threat and being ill is a way of avoiding to live fully and suffer again or we might be scared to be healthy again to only fall ill again after that you know..

what I know for sure as far as my story with CFS is concerned, is that I remember my problems started when I went under emotional traumas at the age of 13. After that I felt very tired now and then, I had colon issues-IBS, I had insomnias and well back then I thought all that was normal and my mum is not the type to worry, she's the type "it's fine, it'll pass" so as a teen I had to look after myself and didn't do a great job! I had to have CFS years later as a result of neglecting that sthg was wrong with me to understand there were unresolved issues there, emotionally, physically and mentally. So I often have to type on that trauma because it's regularly the root cause of some stress/feeling of rejection/abondonment feelings that pop out when I tap about a particular problem in the present time.

[annie]

yes, i can totally relate to what you are saying. the video is very impressive. do you have any of their d.v.ds? i have tried the other eft for a long time but this is different, apart from the tapping i haven't worked out the differences yet. will definitely start tapping his way and see if i can manage a miracle!

[StarDust]

Personally I can't help thinking of when I WASN'T ill, you know...that time were I actually felt like a human being...

[lili2701]

yes robert Smith is incredible!
He uses EFT and NPL and it works even better according to what I have read or seen (there are hundreds of videos of all kind on utube)
it's really interesting because he explains everything so well and it makes u realise what you did wrong (negative thinking and memories) and how to deal with that etc..

these ar efantastic too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iWdtjzlWDag
there are 5 parts

there are also testimonials of pp with fibro for years healing with his method

I dont have his dvds, I watch the videos and tap along.

i think it's more powerful than basic EFT because he uses NPL too, it's similar to what Gupta uses with the stop stop stop. he explains that the longer u keep a negative thought, the more you affirm it and make it happen, same as Gupta when he says u have to break it and then replace by sthg positive.

[alicewoolf]

For me the whole thing of being scared to get well is all tied into what happened four years into my CFS. I was getting better and working but every time I started back on full-time, I would get sick again. It was a very traumatic time for me (followed by a breakdown in hospital) so I guess somewhere a long the line my subconscious started to associate getting well with getting sick again and that's why I am so afraid of coming out of the CFS shell now as much as I hate it. But EFT definitely helping me with these issues so hopefully one day...