I stayed on it for several years, which "happened" to coincide with a general upswing in my overall health. I eventually weaned myself off and within about 3 months, started having a severe decline in my health. It also coincided with increasing stress in my life (or was it just increased perception of stress, since I wasn't on SSRIs?) I went into a severe crash for months, and then started the Gupta programme, which I believe helped me immensely. I ALSO started back on the Lexapro at the same time. My improvement continued for months.
Eventually, about 3 months ago, I weaned off of the Lexapro again, and, lo and behold, I haven't been doing as well. My energy is lower, I'm a lot more moody, weepy, anxious. It feels to me that the subconscious stuff that is going on, keeping my symptomatology going, is less inhibited when I'm NOT on Lexapro. I've always felt that there was a certain OCD like quality to the focus on and fear of symptoms that Gupta describes. In fact, some of the Gupta Programme, esp. the Soften and Flow, is basically "CBT for OCD 101". Meaning, that as you focus on what's worrying you and just let it be there, it loses its power.
Now, back to the Lexapro. This whole thing kind of bugs me. I don't WANT to "need" SSRIs. I want the Gupta stuff to be enough. I want my quite substantial willpower and determination to be enough. Yet, I'm asking myself...am I shooting myself in the foot by not using an available tool?
Anyway, just some musings. I'm curious to know if others have noticed similar improvements on SSRIs - or sometimes it's easier to see what *isn't* working as well, when you're off of them.
I'm currently experimenting with St. John's Wort (not really effective for me, as yet) and 5 HTP, to see if I might get a similar effect. I'm also addressing low cortisol and low t3, which I know can also contribute to general weepiness and inability to handle stress, not to mention overall exhaustion.
Hope everyone is hanging in there and seeing improvements!


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