What seems to come over to me from reading various posts, is that many of us who are battling with illness (at near breaking point sometimes) are not being given kindness, support and acceptance from those around us. Lack of support, lack of kindness (especially to people in pain or ill), lack of respect, lack of thoughtfullness, is NEGLECT. Make no mistake about it and do not be in denial about it. Your feelings and emotions are being neglected.
Neglect is a form of abuse. Also, if you have to suffer shouting, name-calling, threatening body language, swearing, temper, glaring, and many more tactics like this, it is bullying.
If you are being emotionally neglected or bullied or not respected for who you are, this will have a severe impact on you as a person. Even if the behaviour is from your family who say they love you. (They are not consciously trying to hurt you maybe, but are simply struggling themselves or maybe are just selfish or mean).
I believe we attract people in our lives (partners, for example) that treat us the way we have always been treated, ie the way our parents treat us. We believe that this is okay, even though subconsciously we know it isn't. For example if you have been emotionally neglected as a child (but cared for in all other ways such as lovely clothes, toys and food), you may attract a partner who is also emotionally neglects you, but buys you nice things.
A pattern is set up. Learned responses are developed in response to emotional neglect or abuse, such as dependency, panic, breathing problems, tension, stress patterns, and other behaviours of the body.
While Gupta deals with these things in his program, he cannot go into each and every patient history, so it is important for us, the patient, to be aware of CORE ISSUES i.e where these feelings of 'lack of self-worth' came from. Did your family (not their fault) set up these responses in childhood? And did you take them with you into adulthood? And do you still have neglect or abuse happening in your life, even mildly? Your parents probably tried to do their best for you so don't lay blame on them or anyone else, just be aware of the issues. Do not be in denial. Face them. Then you can look at them objectively and choose what to do about them.
The Gupta program is a healing tool to get yourself in emotionally good order so that you can eventually address the balance of your life and the relationships, stresses, etc. I think it is important to have some insight into core issues in order to get properly well. And deal then consciously with life.
(Example: Mother is a tyrant in the home always wanting house to look perfect and children to be seen and not heard. Hence stress as a child is set up, carried forth, then along came a second stress (partner) treated person just the same (more stress), then along came virus and Wham, ill health).
I notice alot of people, both here and in the real world
who are being de-humanised (i.e. not being allowed outlet for their emotions) are either in denial about it (because they do not know what to do about it), or are BLAMING THEMSELVES. Never do this. Never say 'my partner doesn't support me when I'm down' and then say 'but that's okay it's just me' or 'I need to be stronger' or 'I need to be more understanding'. Never do this because you are denying yourself. You, as a person, deserve to be supported, listened to and helped when you are down. No excuses.People are often in denial because if they face up to a fact, it means they have to do something about it. And then the problem is that they don't know what to do, or how to do it. After all, we are all locked in to our families, love em! Gupta does not tell you what to do either, he does not patronise. Gupta shows you what is happening in your body and makes you aware (conscious) of your reactions to those feelings. He leads you down the path of wellness, so that you are enabled to take charge of your own emotions and responses, thereby being in a position to help yourself, being in possession of all the tools. For example, rather than giving thirsty people in Third World countries a drink of water, you give them tools to make a well, so that they can get their own water.
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