almost a month

[noeshe]

I've been doing the AR for almost a month now. No spectacular progress, but I must admit I'm not always putting as much effort in as I probably should (oh no, no shoulds and musts ) The stop stop stop I could defenitely do more, though I do the S&F and the meditation at least once a day, rewatch sessions etc.

I find some interesting things along the way. Sometimes it's like I'm so used to having a racing mind that it just feels uncomfortable and even annoying to stop the thoughts and worries As if my body (or my mind?) feels totally okay with where it is now and doesn't want to change at all. I guess the answer is to break that thought too.

Anyway, I just keep going at the pace I'm comfortable with. I bought myself a Timothy the teddybear (he's really cute in real life) He sits beside my bed, reminding me to stay centered...

[damask-rose]

I think that's very true; we become institutionalised in our ME!

Timothy the teddy reminded me that when I'd finished my Lightning Process training, they gave me a rubber duck, to remind me that no matter how long I had been submerged in the misery of ME, as soon as I let go of all the negative thoughts and anxieties, my true self would bounce back to the surface, and I would remain bouyant through the ups and downs of life. I thought that was neat! Even though it didn't actually happen, until I'd been doing the AR for a few months.

I have to say though, that I had to really knuckle down and STOP every single little negative though and feeling before I began to get better. It's a nuisance, I know, but very worth it.

[Recovery Soon]

Timothy the Teddy Bear is hilarious!

[spring]

[quote="damask-rose"] I had to really knuckle down and STOP every single little negative though and feeling before I began to get better. It's a nuisance, I know, but very worth it.[/quote]

Thanks for that hint damask-rose. What portion of STOPs that you used were full stops and what portion are the other versions.

I'm finding it hard to identify negative thoughts and feelings now. When I was just dealing with symptom thoughts I found it easier but now I'm getting muddled.

Some days it even feels like my whole day is one long negative thought/feeling and I don't know when to do stops.

Other days I have long periods where I don't notice a negative thought or feeling but just thinking about it then seems to bring on a series of thoughts which need stopping. On those days I have often let the programme slip, which then leads to a dip.

I think I have the 'speed wobbles' and am rather confused. I need to establish a more comfortable rhythm or something

[efly]

Hi Noeshe,
I found in the beginning when I was sssssoo bad with so many thoughts...Id just stand up any time and do about 10 in a row of stop stop...Put an egg timer on every hr...stop what Im doing when i heard the alarm and do lots of stops.......
This helped for me.......there were so many thoughts it didnt matter when i did the stops as long as I did them
Good luck
Keep going
Efly

[noeshe]

[quote="spring"]
Some days it even feels like my whole day is one long negative thought/feeling and I don't know when to do stops.

Other days I have long periods where I don't notice a negative thought or feeling but just thinking about it then seems to bring on a series of thoughts which need stopping. On those days I have often let the programme slip, which then leads to a dip.
[/quote]
Same thing happening here. Either I have the negative thought racing around all the time, or noticing none at all.

Efly, very good advice! I guess I could just admit myself to doing the stops for a certain time a day, until the thoughts become less, and then start 'catching' them when they come up

[niaholt]

The same thing happens with me. If we go away for a few days the negative thoughts just keep coming while we are driving. Any change in the domestic scene. Some days I dont get any and then other days I get a flood. Lately I have had a dip and been back in bed too sick to do much Stopping so I made an audio tape using Louise Hay affirmations. I then put on Lots of Stops...the full deal and lay there and repeat everything.

This worked out fine as I could just lay in bed and put the tape on....hear my own voice. I would move my legs as though I was standing on the mat. Might seem crazy but it invigorated me. I then did not have the guilts about just laying there like a vegetable not feeling motivated to do anything.